


When I Moved Back

by abiotic_butterfly



Category: South Park
Genre: Coming Back To School, Drinking, High School, M/M, Moving, Mpreg, Old Friends Are Now Dating, Parties, Secret Child, Teenage Pregnancy, Trans, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex, taking care of children
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-07-28 10:39:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16239941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abiotic_butterfly/pseuds/abiotic_butterfly
Summary: Tweek moved away during the year he and Craig got together. It turned out to be a blessing when he gave birth to his daughter and didn’t have to tell Craig or anyone else. But years later he’s forced to move back and finds himself maybe rekindling a romance with his old boyfriend.





	1. Please Don’t Make Me Go To School

**Author's Note:**

> (I published this on Wattpad before I got AO3 so if you see it there it’s not plagiarism)

I was awakened by a block being thrown at me. Even though this happens often I still wake up terrified. 

"Ah! W-What?!" I looked around frantically, my eyes locking on my 10 month old daughter. 

"Up!" She said excitedly, she was trying to pull herself up using the crib bars. 

"Morning sweetie." I had learned to do better about my stuttering, I've gotten better recently only really doing it when I'm scared. 

"Daddy! Outside?" She asked excitedly. 

She was asking if we were going anywhere today, sadly I was.

"No sweetheart, I gotta go to school." I can't hold back from rolling my eyes. School. Ugh.

"No." She said sternly. 

"I don't want to either, but I gotta." She huffed and attempted to stand up again. I pulled the covers off the bed and went over to her crib. 

I put some of her blonde hair behind her ear. "I know sweetie, but don't worry. I won't be in school forever. I'll be out in two years. Well three if you include this one." 

I hoist her up and rest her against my shoulder. 

She sighs and curls herself into my neck. "No go..." She grabbed a fist full of my shirt. 

I didn't wanna move and leave her but I couldn't be late for school. "I gotta get ready for school." I place her down on the bed where I just happily was. 

"Daddy!" She cried. She looked so small sitting on the bed, I already felt bad about leaving her...no I can't stay home. "Sorry sweetie." I quickly changed my pants and put on a new shirt. "Book bag- book bag- book bag-" I scanned the room before catching sight of it in the corner. 

I slung it over my shoulder and pick up my daughter, Carlie, and head downstairs where my mom was cooking breakfast. 

She looked up and smiled. "Morning Tweekie, want some pancakes?" I shook my head, even if I really did I was late as is. 

"Sorry, I'm running late." I placed Carlie in her high chair and kissed her goodbye. "I'll see you after school, baby." She gave a sad wave and I was out the door, running for the hopefully not there yet, bus. 

I had moved into a house that was close to my old one so it was easy to get to the bus stop. The other kids were there too. I remember them all, doubt they remember me though. 

As I got closer I could make out who was who. They hadn't changed much. I stopped suddenly, what if they did remember me. We had gone to school together since 8th grade. They could all remember me...all of them. 

I shook my head, he's not even here. 

I walked over to the group and calmly stood next to them. Maybe they'll just ignore me. "Who's the new kid?" Asked one of them. It was worth hoping. 

"Fuck off Cartman, we were in the middle of talking about how you're wrong and you just change the subject. Ha! See, proves it." I glance over to see Kyle yelling at Cartman. He didn't change at all, same orange coat with green gloves and matching hat atop of his mess of red hair. Couldn't forget hair like that. 

Next was Cartman, he had lost weight. Wow, he looked better. Not skinny, but still better. He had his normal red coat with a blue hat on. 

Then there's Stan, brown coat, black hair and dark blue hat. Damn, so many hats. 

Lastly was Kenny, holy fuck did he get hot. But before my mind could wonder a smaller light blonde jumped into his arms. Butters? 

"Hey Ken, I've been missin you. Summer wasn't the same without you." The blue shirt boy said. "Aw, I missed you too Buttercup." Kenny was smiling from ear to ear. 

I found myself jealous of them, they looked so happy. So in love. I turned back around looking down. 

"Hey new kid!" It was Cartman again, at least he doesn't seem to recognize me. I turn towards him an Look up. "Y-Yeah?" 

"Hey you look familiar..." he looked at me puzzled. 

"N-No I um j-just moved here." God the stuttering is back. Fuck they'll recognize that. 

Kyle walked closer to me, "I think I remember. You're that spazz kid that moved away right?" 

Fuck- fuck- fuck- I gotta fix this. I stood up straighter and swallowed hard. "No, I'm sorry I don't know who you're talking about." I did it I didn't stutter. 

Cartman rolled his eyes, "never mind that freak couldn't say one sentence without having a meltdown." 

Well, Cartman's still the same. 

"Bus!" Kyle shouted. The bus pulled up with an angry old lady in the drivers seat. I walked past her quickly, I didn't need any trouble from her. 

The boys from the stop moved into seats and separated. I looked around finding all of the seats empty. No wait there's one. I ran to the back and was about to sit down when I saw who was already sitting there. 

There was no way I couldn't recognize him. Same dark blue jacket, same dark blue chello hat. F-F-Fuck! There was Craig Tucker.

His eyes turned to me and he looked at me confused.

There's no way he doesn't remember. "S-Sorry there's no more seats left. Could I sit with you?" 

"Tweek?" He completely ignored my question. I sat down in the seat as the bus began to move. "Tweek, is it really you?" 

I looked up to be met with his perfect blue eyes, the same ones Claire has... 

"Y-Yeah, it's me." He smiled a bit, I missed his smile so much. "I haven't seen you in forever, you never stayed in touch." 

I nervously played with the buttons on my shirt. "S-Sorry I got busy." 

He was silent for a while before speaking again. "I never got with someone else..." I looked over at him, shocked. He didn't move on? It's been three years. How could he not have? 

"I went on a couple dates, kissed a few people. But other than that nothing. I haven't had sex since...you know." 

My cheeks turned a bright red. "I-I um haven't either." And I don't think I ever will. 

He looked back to me with that adorable smile. God it fucking melted me. Ugh, why does he have to be like that? Like he still loves me, god if he knew...he'd hate me. Wasting two years for me to come back with a kid he doesn't know about. 

The bus comes to a stop in front of the school and I try not to make it seem like I'm eager to leave. 

I thought maybe once we got to school Craig would go his separate way, instead he followed me into the building. "Clyde! Token!" He called out to our old friends that were hanging out by the lockers. 

"Tweek?" Clyde asked, his eyes wide. Token had turned his attention away from his locker to stare at me.

"Y-Yeah." Clyde smiled brightly and embraced me with a hug. Token offered a small smile, "welcome back."

Clyde let me go and backed up, smile still in place. "Hey it looks like you don't have to go alone to the school dance this Friday." He directed it at Craig. 

I looked back at the taller boy who had a small blush on his cheeks. "Only if Tweek wants to." He monotoned. I'll never get tired of his voice. 

I was zoning out when I realized the three were staring at me. "W-What?" I looked between the three. 

"Wanna go to the dance with me?" Craig asked. He might have sounded like he didn't care, but if I didn't say yes it would have crushed him. "O-Oh I don't know..." I looked back up into his hopeful eyes. "Okay..." 

Craig cracked a smile. Clyde let out a 'aww' and when I looked over at him he was smiling. Token rolled his eyes and grabbed Clyde's hand. "We better getting to class, can't be late." Clyde might have left with Token but he was already complaining about going to class.

"Are they together?" I looked back at Craig who nodded. "Yeah, Clyde went out with Bebe about two years back and she broke his heart. Token was there to pick up the pieces. But when he was doing it he left some of his own. They've been dating ever since."

"Who else is together?" I questioned.

He thought for a moment. "Well Kenny is with Butters now, took him forever to figure out that he was sleeping with all the wrong people. Stan and Wendy had been on and off for about a year till he finally dumped her for Kyle. Cartman is actually with someone too, her names Heidi. She seems okay." 

Wow...I missed a lot. 

He nudged me gently, "we should get to class." 

"I gotta go to the office to get my schedule." Craig looked reluctant to be apart from me but turned and walked the other way. 

I walked down to the office and got my schedule. Math first period...fun. I followed the map on the back and made it to the math room. 

The class was getting settled into their seats when I spotted Craig in the back. He must have caught me looking at him because he stopped looking at the board and was now focused on me.

I fixed my bag on my back and walked up the stairs and down the row to sit next to him. 

"Looks like we have the same math." I nodded, twitching slightly. I haven't had this problem in forever. 

"Good morning class, I hope you're all excited to be starting 10th grade. We have a lot to do." The teacher began to write on the board and I began to zone out. 

I wasn't supposed to have anything to do with Craig. He's not supposed to find out, how will I explain? 'Oh hi Craig, you know how in eighth grade we fucked? Well you accidentally knocked me up and then I moved and never told you.' I can't do that...but I can't keep it from him. God, and Carlie. What happens when she gets older and asks where he is. How can I say I was in contact with him and just never mentioned it. But what if he hates me...he could want nothing to do with her. Which I could see, we're only 15. But I hope he wouldn't be like that. 

I worried all throughout the entire period, and basically the rest of the day. Before I knew it I was walking home with Craig, how did that even happen? 

I stop when I see my house coming up. "Well I'm here...I'll s-see you later." I nervously smile and dart towards my door. "Bye Tweek!" He shouts after me. 

I opened my front door and quickly close it. My mom looked up from the tv where she was with Carlie. "Hey sweetie how was your first day of school?" 

I shrugged and sat down in an empty seat. Carlie made grabby hands in my direction. I smiled and picked her up, placing her against my warm body. She did that cute thing where she scrunched up her nose and pulled my shirt into her hands. 

I had always grown fond of her doing that. "So what are we watching?" I looked at my mom who just shook her head and shrugged. "No idea, but the dudes are pretty hot." She wiggled her eyebrows in my direction. 

I rolled my eyes but there was no heart behind it. Carlie whimpered, trying to get my attention. I looked down to see her sucking on my shirt, so she was hungry. "Sweetie, don't get my shirt wet." She smiled at me. 

I could never stay mad at her, I sat up and brought her over to the kitchen to get her something to eat. 

She settled for mashed bananas, after pointing at the coffee in the pot and me saying she couldn't have that till she was older. 

She cheered happily when she finished, getting banana on her pink onesie. "Now I gotta change you." I groaned, but it was in a playful tone. She just laughed. 

I was upstairs digging through one of my drawers designated as hers. "So you want a cat or a bunny for your shirt?" She kicked her feet against the dresser in thought. She stopped and looked over at me happily. "Cat!" She yelled. 

"Great." I pulled out the purple cat shirt and changed her into it, grabbing blue pants to go with it. "Done, now what about a nap now?"

She whined and waved her arms in disagreement. "No nap!" She cried out. 

I shouldn't have mentioned it. "Ah come'on I'll be here when you wake up. Just...doing homework." 

She cried for about three minutes before falling asleep wrapped in a polka dot covered blanket. 

I sighed in relief, jumping onto my bed and starting my homework. I must have been doing my homework for a while because I felt my eyes get heavy and when I shut them they don't open till hours later.


	2. Care To Go To The School Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a school dance and Tweek is trying to find a way to make everything work.

My whole week consisted of the same thing. Get up, get dressed, shuffle through school and try to act normal around Craig. 

I've got most of those covered. Like getting dressed and...listening to teachers talk. I can do that. But looking at Craig and having to keep Carlie from him hurt. 

So that was my week so far, it was Friday and I couldn't be happier. Carlie and I were planning on going somewhere. I would wear different clothes and a hat to prevent anyone recognizing me. Yes it gets hot standing in the sun at the park with a hat and heavy coat but it's worth it.

"Park! Park!" Carlie cheered. She was watching me dress from her crib. She always loved the park, so each day she would remind me of how she wanted to go and every day I told her. 'This weekend I'll take you to the park.' 

So today when I came home from the dance we would go to the park. Along with other stuff like coloring, blocks, snacks and other boring kid stuff would be my weekend.

Not that I didn't enjoy doing all that stuff but, you can only watch Elmo for so long.

"Yup today's park day." She cheered happily. Her little hands clapping excitedly. "I'll see you after school little bug." I brushed her cheek with my thumb. She grabbed my thumb and experimentally bent it. It was adorable to see her playing with my much longer fingers.

I glanced at the clock and sighed, time to go to school. Carlie gave a sad whine when she noticed my attention was somewhere else. 

"Sorry sweetheart I gotta get to school. It'll see you later okay?" She pouted but sat down in her crib, bouncing a bit when she did. 

I grabbed my bag, slinging it over my shoulder. "Bye..." I disappointedly turned heading down the stairs. 

"Tweek I made breakfast, want some?" My mom was yet again busy running around the kitchen making pancakes. 

"Thanks but I'm good, Carlie's sleeping upstairs. Hopefully...can you keep an eye on her. She's starting to try to climb out of the crib, I don't want her to get hurt."

My mom smiled and nodded, "don't worry I'll watch her." I gave her a smile in return and headed for the door. "Oh hey, can you watch her a little longer? There's a school dance today." 

She nodded and wiggled her eyebrows, "is there a special boy you're going with?" I unintentionally blushed, shaking my head. I can't tell her that I'm going with Craig. She'll do something to mess everything up. What I have going so far works. 

"No I'm just going with some of my old friends." She gave me a happy smile and resumed her pancake making. "Well have fun sweetie." I nodded but then realized she couldn't see me. "I will, bye!" I opened the front door and walked outside, the autumn air was nice against my skin. 

I picked up my pace trying to get to the bus stop before the bus left and I'd have to walk to school. Luckily I made it in time to see the yellow death on wheels pull up. I made it on the bus to see kids yelling and throwing paper at each other, the bus driver yelling at them. The dance must have everyone over excited. 

"Tweek!" My attention was caught by the blue hat boy who was waving me to the back. I bit my lip, walking down the aisle. I sat next to him, he was smiling happily at me. "Ready for the dance?" I missed seeing him like this...so happy. 

"Uh, y-yeah. Can't w-wait." I gave a faint smile, but it didn't mask my nervousness. I'd never been to a school dance before. The school I had went to when I moved disapproved of such activities deeming them useless. 

"Hey, Bebe's having a party after the dance. It's supposed to be good, wanna go after?" Craig was practically bouncing in his seat, though he tried to stop himself by gripping onto the seat. 

Party? Oh god...I can't go to one of those. I'll mess up, or get drunk and do something stupid. Besides I have to go home and watch Carlie. But I can't tell him that, I'll either sound like a chicken or give away my secret. 

"Y-Yeah uh, sure." I let out a small whimper but put on a smile to cover it up. Craig's smile was so wide it hurt to look at, but you didn't wanna look away. "Great." He manged out between the smile. 

Craig slowly lifted his arm, placing it over my shoulders. I looked at him nervously, but he was looking out the window, a small blush on his face. Aw, I haven't seen him like this since he first asked me out on a date. 

I couldn't help myself from moving closer to him, his arm fitting more snugly around my shoulder.  

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The school day seemed to go by faster than the rest and before I knew it 8th period had sneaked up on me. I was sitting in math class chewing on the end of my pencil. God what am I gonna do?! What am I gonna- Before I could finish my thought the bell rung signifying school was over. 

The whole class dispersed and I was left sitting alone. Mr. Garrison, still couldn't believe he'd followed us from Elementary and Middle school to Highschool. 

"Tweek? Why are you still here? I gotta get home before that awful school dance starts and due to the new rules I can't leave the classroom without locking the door. This is just a long explanation to basically say get the fuck out."  

I reluctantly stood up and left the classroom. I went to my locker to put my books away, I'd grab my bag after the dance. It didn't take long for Token, Clyde and Craig to find me. 

"Hey Tweek ready to boogie?" Clyde laughed at himself, causing Token to lightly elbow him. "Quit it guys." Craig pushed past them to move closer to Tweek. "Ready to go in?" He asked. I looked over to the door leading to the gym where it was being held. 

I might not have been ready but I had nothing to worry about, it wasn't a fancy dance. It was just a fun and random one for no real reason. "Y-Yeah." 

He smiled at me and gentle took my hand, looking at me to see if I was okay with it. I looked down at our intertwined hands but didn't object. I kind of missed it...

Clyde's smile intensified, "come on guys let's go!" He grabbed Token's hand and started fast walking towards the gym doors. I looked up at Craig who just shrugged and started following Token and Clyde, me walking right next to him.

When we passed the gym doors everything was a different color. Blue, pink and green flashed violently while loud music blasted. Token and Clyde were somewhere in the mix of people, I couldn't find them.

Craig pulled me closer to him so we were chest to chest. I let out a startled yelp at the sudden movement. Craig just smiled and grabbed my other hand, rocking us back and forth to the strange dance music. 

It continued like that for a while, me and Craig moving back and forth. Not really dancing correctly, but no one else was either. I caught sight of a couple friends, like Butters and Kyle. But other than that everyone was sucked up into the crowd. 

"What anything to drink? I think they have some cafeteria juice boxes around here..." I shook my head violently. "N-No thank you. I don't w-wanna loose you in the c-crowd." Craig smiled down at me, it was gentle and kind. "Don't worry Tweeky, I'm not gonna loose you." I couldn't help giving him a smile back, his kind words hitting that soft spot in me.

I heard a screech and then a tapping echoing through the room. "Hello? Oh- hey everybody. The dance is about to end so if you'll please make your way out of the gym that would be appreciated." Wendy nodded at her own words, putting he microphone awkwardly back in its stand. 

Bebe ran up onto the stage, her shirt messed up and hair more fizzy than usual. She messily grabbed the microphone, shouting into it. "Hear that everyone?! To my house we go!" She tried to fit it back where Wendy left it but inevitably dropped it on the stage. 

The group of teens cheered, everyone leaving the school in a hurry to get to her house. Bebe already seemed drunk so that means they'll be plenty of booze there. If you want to get a whole bunch of teens over, get alcohol. 

I was pushed into Craig by one of the people running out of the gym. "Holy shit!" Craig's reflexes quickly went into action, grabbing onto my arms and pulling me back up. "Watch it there Tweeky you could get hurt." I nervously looked at him, I hope he's kidding. 

"Hey guys!" Kenny waved as he ran up to us, he was in a white t-shirt. His jacket no where to be seen. Butters was tucked under his arm, smiling a big smile. 

"Going to the party losers?" He joked at us. Craig rolled his eyes, "yeah Mcwhoredick we're going." Kenny's smile just widened. "See ya there." He pulled Butters along before he could really voice anything. 

"Token was supposed to drive us there. Grab your bag and we'll go find him." I nodded and ran to my locker to quickly grab my bag. I looked back to where Craig was supposed to be but couldn't see him. 

Shit that's what I was afraid of. 

"Cr-Craig?" Ah, shit. The hallway was filled with students and a few chaperones. Craig no where to be seen. I turned the other way to find Token right there. "Agh! W-What the h-hell Token?!" My heart was racing from the jump scare. 

Clyde laughed his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Oh, Jesus Tweek. We didn't mean to, it's just us chill." I glared at him crossing my arms. "I know it's you now. I didn't a second ago." I said defiantly. 

Token sighed, "well where's Craig?" He peered over my shoulder. 

"I d-don't know! I mean, h-he was right there w-when I went to get my b-bag and then he just. Disappeared!" I looked around worriedly, where the hell could he have gone? 

"He's around here somewhere, don't know- oh there he is!" Clyde pointed to an annoyed Craig was walking down a hallway. 

"W-Where the hell d-did you go?!" I yelled at him. "Some idiot decided to bother me so beat him up." Now that I looked at it I could see a bruise on his cheek. "Y-You beat h-him up?" Craig beats people up still? I thought he'd grow out of it. 

"Only when they're being annoying." He grabbed my hand. "Wanna go now?" I started to stare at him before realizing he asked me something. "W-What? Oh yeah, l-let's go." 

We walked walked out of school and to Tokens car and began the drive to Bebe's house. I looked over at Craig who was staring out the window. I don't know why but I didn't like the idea of him beating up people. He got hurt too. 

Maybe they deserved it, but knowing Craig everybody bothers him. I rolled my eyes at myself. It's just some random kids at school. Who cares? I bet tons of kids get beat up and beat people up at South Park High. So what if Craig does? 

I thought about it for a little while but then we pulled up at Bebe's and I ultimately forgot about the topic.


	3. Beer Was A Mistake For A Reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tweek goes to a party.

Inside Bebe's party was tons of already drunks kids, not that I was planning on joining in on the drinking fun. But it's hard to not notice when they are bumbling and screaming everywhere. The house seemed to already be a wreck, furniture knocked over, beer and other alcoholic beverages spilled on the floor. 

I bit my lip as I looked around, not really wanting to have anything to do with anyone. After all, I had to go home and take care of Carlie so I couldn't necessarily get wasted or high. 

I felt someone nudge my side and looked up to find Craig smiling and motioning me to follow him. He walked through a group of people and into what was left of the kitchen. I hurriedly followed after him, not wanting to get lost. 

I grabbed onto his arm and stayed by his side as he migrated to the counter, grabbing one of the many beers that were placed there. He twisted off the cap, putting it to his lips and taking a swig. He sighed as he pulled it away, "you want one?" He looked at me and then to the rest of the beers. 

My eyes widened and I grew nervous. Of course I wanted to drink, but... "sure, I'll have one." I anxiously grabbed one, unscrewing the top and taking a long sip before I could change my mind. Of course deep down I knew Craig would never force me to drink but I didn't want to be a buzzkill and not do anything. I just won't get high. Problem solved. 

I coughed as I released the bottle from my lips, it burned of course. I rarely drank and when I did I tended not to enjoy it.  

Craig sighed, taking another sip. I looked up at him and then down at my beer. "So what exactly do you do at parties?" I asked tensely. 

"Well usually I get drunk, go down to the basement where Kenny is and get high and for the most part that's it. They always have those stupid games like spin the bottle or truth or dare. Normally I find them annoying and a waste of time. But once you get drunk playing isn't so bad."

I nodded dumbly, not really sure what to do with Craig's information. I didn't find most of that stuff enjoyable at all.

"I'm not really sure about all that...maybe we could be alone. I don't know." I looked down at my tennis shoes, scraping them along the tile floor's. 

I looked up briefly to see Craig shrug, "sure. I don't really care what we do. As long as we get to hang out it's fine by me."

I nodded relived and followed Craig as he grabbed my hand and took me through the house to the stairs which would inevitably lead us to the bedrooms. 

We walked down the hallway and into one of the last bedrooms. It appeared to be a guest room since it didn't have any personal belongings. Just the normal white sheets and perfectly made bed. Some uncluttered dressers and side tables were there too. 

Craig pulled me into the room and slammed the door shut, I whipped around and looked at the door. Craig smiled regretfully, "sorry didn't mean to do that." I nodded and gave him a smile. "It's okay."

I looked around, my cheeks red, everything seemed to make me blush. Craig walked closer to me, putting his hands on my arms and pressing his chest to mine. My breathing started to quicken and my heart beat went up. 

He ran his hand through my hair and bent down to give me a kiss. I was unsure what to do and I froze up. Craig pushed his tongue inside my mouth and I seemed to instantly relax. A small moan made it's way up my throat and I didn't noticed how I was moving backwards until I fell on the bed. Craig moved on top of me, working his jacket off and then my shirt. I felt an electric zap go through me when I felt our erections rub. I released his mouth so I could concentrate on unzipping our pants and shimming them off.  

This wasn't exactly how I had planned it going but I wasn't exactly going to complain. Not when Craig was pulling off his shirt and was crawling back over top of me. 

Craig kissed me again, sliding his tongue into my mouth and moaning against me. He pulled away, a gasp leaving his mouth. "Damn Tweek, you got better from eighth grade." He breathed out. 

I blushed heavily, I was sure my entire face was red by now. "You got a condom?" He breathed out again. I looked up at him, almost in a daze. A condom i probably a good idea this time. 

"N-No I don't do you?" He shook his head, "I'll be right back, I'm sure Kenny does." He leaped off the bed and out the door, leaving me laying on the bed awkwardly. I swallowed and waited, not knowing what else to do. 

Craig was back sooner than I thought, "what'd I tell you?" He smirked, joining me on the bed again. He ripped open the condom wrapper and smiled at me. "Ready?" 

I slowly nodded, guess this is my first party.


	4. The Aftermath Of Sleeping With An Old Flame

I woke up in a dark and rather warm room, I felt sweaty and sticky all over my heart racing when I looked over at who was creating more warmth. Craig fucking Tucker. I inwardly cursed at myself. 

How could I be so stupid?! I sleep with the guy that knocked me up! God I'm a moron!

My eyes widened and I frantically looked around the room for the only thing that was keeping me from having a panic attack right there and then. 

"Tweek? What the fuck are you doing?"

I looked back at the bed to find Craig slowing staring to rise and rub at his eyes. He yawned and scratched his fucked up sex black hair. 

"Ah! I was um- I was tryin' find somethin'..." I went back to quickly looking so that I didn't look like a complete idiot for scanning someone else bedroom floor. 

"We used a condom ya know, don't have to worry about getting an STD." He stretched and fell back onto the bed, kicking out his legs to flex the mussels in them as well. 

My whole body loosened and I could finally feel myself start to breathe again. "Okay- that's um- that's good..." I tried to nod but it was more of a violent head jerking if anything. 

Craig 'hmmed' and closed his eyes, his attention drifting elsewhere while I tried to relive what just happened. I hadn't had sex in forever...not since eighth grade and that was a huge fucking mistake so I never attempted again, well that and the fact that I wasn't really interested in anyone else and no one else was interested in me. 

At my old school I was the loser kid with a fucking kid. I didn't have a lot of friends, many people thinking I was too weird or a slut because I had a daughter at fourteen. But I wasn't a whore, I only had sex once and it wasn't even really sex. Something that lasts under three minutes shouldn't count. But it did and now I have Carlie and she's the greatest thing in the world. The only good thing that's ever happened because of my fucked up body. 

I hate when I remember all those people that cursed at me on the street because I was a freak of nature...that I didn't deserve to subject a child to my demonic ways. But no matter what I love Carlie and she's perfectly safe with me...

I looked back to Craig, wonderful and blissfully unaware Craig. The only person I've ever let touch me in such a meaningful way. But I knew it wouldn't last...i was stupid and foolish to think I could ever have something with him again. That ship sailed when I had Carlie.

If he knew...god if he knew what kind of a freak I am he'd hate me. He's curse me out just like the people on the street and he'd leave me even more heartbroken than before. So I won't even open that door to begin with. 

"I gotta get home...agh! my mom's gonna kill me." I rushed out of there before I even got a full response from the other boy. I just didn't want to take the chance of him asking me to stay because I know I wouldn't be able to deny him the company. 

So I ran, and I ran, and I ran. 

I ran all the way home believe it or not, sure I was out of breath and almost puking on the sidewalk but I made it home at practically three o'clock in the morning. 

My dad was the one to answer the door, his lips pulled into a frown as he glanced me over. "Why the hell are you standing here at ass o'clock in the morning?"

I shrugged, "overstayed at the party...I know I should have ah! been home earlier...sorry..." 

He nodded and opened the door for me, letting me walk inside and straight up to my room where I found Carlie passed out in her crib. She had tear stains on her cheeks, probably crying for hours...

I didn't want to wake her up but from recently reliving all the awful things that happened while I was carrying her I just needed her to be close to me. In any way I could get.

So I reached in and carefully plucked her out, letting myself and her fall gently against the bedding. 

She twisted in her sleep and for a moment I thought she was going to wake up. But thankfully she went right back to passed out and I breathed a sigh of relief. Slowly I curled around her, trying to find a cozy place to finally fall asleep.


End file.
